What Does Raising Responsible Kids Take?

How do you get better at raising responsible kids?

What do you think: Is 7 years old the age at which the label "irresponsible" is ready to be placed on a person?

I will share with you something that happened recently... A neighbor child was playing with my grandchildren. He visits a great deal. A common problem he has is one of finding his shoes when he has to go home. He is 7 years old with a problem even I have!

When his father came to tell him to go home, Trevor began to search frantically for his shoes. In this case, they were his Heelys - pretty expensive shoes. He searched and searched and could not find them. He searched for at least 15 minutes.

Soon, his mother also came over to search for the shoes. While they were searching, his mother kept telling him how irresponsible he is. He was crying and frustrated, especially since everyone else had given up searching for the shoes. Eventually even the mother gave up. She told him to apologize to me for taking my time in searching for his shoes. I told him that that was OK and that I am sure his shoes will show up. I told him I often have to hunt for my shoes, too.

About 30 minutes later, I received another call at the behest of his mother. Trevor told me they had found his shoes on top of his hamper at home. Again he was crying. He apologized to me for taking my time.

How Is this Related to Raising Responsible Kids?

Well, this child is in a family which is in the process of selling their home to move closer to their relatives and, of course, away from the friends he already has. This particular day, he had just come back after three days away visiting his relatives in the area where he will be moving.

So he is already under a great deal of stress. And his parents place a label on him - irresponsible.

They are not unlike you or me. In anger and frustration we lash out and don’t think about our words and the long-range effects they cause. But at seven years old, this child is being told that he is irresponsible.

If those words are said to him often enough, he will end up seeing himself as irresponsible and act accordingly. Even with those words being said to him once, he is beginning to think of himself in those terms.

Raising children to be rich starts with raising responsible kids!

We need to help them see that they are responsible. On occasions they may have set-backs or learning experiences, but that does not change who they are. They are responsible, among other things. They are valuable.

Never let anger and/or frustration be your excuse to pin a negative label on your child. You want the best for him or her. And to give the best to your offspring, you must be the best you can be... at all times.

Raising responsible kids means asking ourselves: "what is responsibility?"

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